Aloha, I’m Koalani (she/her)
Trauma-Informed Therapist in San Diego, CA
Aloha, I’m Koalani, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist by day, mom of 2 energetic boys— 24/7.
I have over a decade of clinical experience, including seven years supporting military families, as well as working in pediatric medical settings; helping individuals and families navigate life’s most intense transitions. But underneath it all, I am human, just like you. And I believe that the best therapy happens when clinical expertise meets deep, lived empathy.
I became a new mom in 2020, during a time of profound global uncertainty and isolation. With the world shut down and support systems far away, my fears and anxieties were at an all-time high. Like many parents in the perinatal period, I was deeply affected by isolation, emotional disconnection, chronic exhaustion, and a loss of sense of self. Even as a therapist, my mental health was significantly impacted, and I found myself struggling behind closed doors.
I also knew firsthand the life-changing impact therapy can have. Seeking support helped me reconnect with myself and move through that challenging season, reinforcing my belief in therapy as a powerful space for healing, reflection, and growth.
Driven by my own experience with postpartum depression and anxiety, I felt called to support others navigating a similar path. I strive to create a warm, safe, and healing space for individuals seeking support during pregnancy, postpartum, and early parenthood. My approach integrates clinical expertise with lived experience, offering deep empathy and understanding for the emotional and relational challenges that can arise as individuals and families adjust to the demands of daily life.
Therapeutic Style
My approach is intentionally slow-paced, warm, and collaborative. In a world where you are often prioritizing everyone else’s needs, our sessions are a space where you are the priority.
Depending on your goals, our work may include:
Somatic & Grounding Exercises: To help settle a mind that feels constantly on.
EMDR & Trauma-Informed Care: To process trauma, stress, or past experiences that are showing up in the present.
Values-Based Tools (ACT): To help you move toward the life you want, even when it feels chaotic and impossible.
Self-Compassion Practices: Shifting the inner bully into a voice of support.
Professional Background
Licensure & Education
California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, #93756
MA in Marriage and Family Therapy, University of San Diego
BA in Humanities, Loyola Marymount University
Minor in Sociology
Advanced Clinical Training
Trauma & EMDR: EMDR Level 1 & 2 Trained; Trauma-Focused CBT
Perinatal Specialization: Advanced Psychotherapy for Perinatal Mood Disorders
Mindfulness Modalities: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Mindful Self-Compassion, Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction
Family & Parenting: AAMFT Approved Supervisor; Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator, Certified Infant Massage Instructor
Therapy With Koalani Is
AUTHENTIC
I am human, and that’s how I’m going to show up. During our sessions I will be drinking water, sipping on coffee, and most days my hair will be pulled back in a bun. I want you to come just as you are too!
INCLUSIVE
All are welcome into this space. No mater your gender, identity, religion, race, culture, your history—all of it. Every part of what makes you, you, is seen and accepted.
COLLABORATIVE
I meet you where you’re at, address your unique needs, and tailor my sessions to what you’re bringing with you into each session—on an emotional level or if you’re literally bringing your baby to session.
INTENTIONAL
If you’re looking for direct, short-term therapy we may not be the best fit. Therapy with me is slow-paced and intentional. We don’t rush. We don’t fix. We slow down and get curious.
READY TO FINALLY GET THE SUPPORT YOU DESERVE?
Let’s Get Started!
Koalani Lahr, LMFT
Trauma-Informed Therapist in San Diego, CA
Virtual Therapy throughout California:
San Diego | La Jolla | Del Mar | Carlsbad| Oceanside | Escondido| La Mesa | Point Loma | Temecula| Laguna | Anaheim | Irvine | Los Angeles| Long Beach| Santa Monica | Culver City | Pasadena | Glendale | Santa Barbara | San Francisco | San Jose| Palo Alto | Sacramento | Oakland | Nevada City| and more…
Call or Text (619) 859-5551 to get started today!